Cause the More You Know...

Mr. T told me the other day that it was time for a new belly picture. 
Loose translation:  "Dang girl, you're getting big!"

It's so true.  I think I'm probably "normal" big, but there is really no other adjective to describe it.  I am carting around a human after all.

We went to our birthing class at the hospital this past weekend and both learned quite a bit.  For example, Mr. T thought that the painful part of labor was the big finish, not the contractions part.  I'm glad we got that cleared up or he would have thought I was a huge drama queen for the majority of the delivery.

I learned that babies can't breath through their mouths until they are about 3 months old.  How did I not know this!?!  That's why Moms are so protective of their little ones and make you wash your hands before holding their newborn.  They're not crazy, just informed.  A nose cold for a little tyke can be bad news.  So Mr. T and I have decided to invest in a hazmat suit for people to wear when they come to visit.  Don't be offended if we hand you this to put on when you come over:



As my belly grows, so does my excitement and my nervousness.  I'm not exactly sure how this little girl is going to get out!  I ran some basic calculations the other day and determined that it's just not possible.  It's not going to work.  That's how I feel.

I suppose in about 6 more weeks we'll find out!

Couple Fries Short

Yesterday Mr. T and I did a little traveling for his business and a little shopping for the baby.

I went into a clothing store in search of a Bridesmaid dress to wear to the upcoming wedding of my former roomie, Melissa, who is beautiful, generous and has a charming amount of "sassy" in her.

I found a clerk in the store and asked if they sell maternity clothes.
"For women?" she asked.
"Umm, yes." I said.

Perhaps I mumbled when I asked if they sell maternity clothes. 
I mumble sometimes.
Or perhaps she was a couple of fries short of a happy meal.
Either way, she blessed me with a chuckle.

Also, we asked a different lady if she knew where the Target was in town. 
"Oh yes," she said.  "Just go up this street about a mile.  I'm not from here, but I think it's about a mile.  It'll be on your left-hand side."

And so we went.  And went.  And went.
And turned around and went some more.

Finally found a blue collar worker and asked him if he knew where it was.
"Actually, we don't have a Target here."
Great.  Nothing like adding a hour of aimless wondering to your day. 

So onto the next town we went in search of Target, which proved to be a more fruitful endeavor.
We entered, already a little tired and with high hopes of making it a fast shopping trip so we could get home at a decent hour.

Except I forgot to calculate in one factor...

Have you ever been stroller shopping with an Engineer?
It's not fast.  Very funny, but not fast.

Mr. T needed to go down the line, take the strollers down, analyze the specs, figure out how they fold up and unfold, and "Hey, what do you think this plastic thing is for?, etc.

Needless to say, we were overwhelmed and decided to wait on that purchase.  We did find a car seat, however.  Somehow we dropped a small fortune on it and we're not even sure why, except the one we purchased gave us a greater sense of peace.  Not because it was safer.  More because we liked the color scheme and fabric.  I think we've been bam-boozled.

Newby parents.

I guess the point is that we are all a couple fries short of a happy meal sometimes.  It's the spice of life, if you ask me.  

Friends For Hire

I'd like to take a few moments to tell ya'll about my lovely birthday.

Before I do, let me say that I have the best circle of friends any girl could ask for!  Mr. T went above and beyond, as usual, and my former roomie, Jordanne, drove all the way from Kansas City to help with festivities. 

I felt very special and celebrated.  Everyone should feel that way on their birthday!  That's why I've decided to hire them out.  I'm putting together package deals that you can choose from, depending on your budget and preferences.  Here's what the deals include: 

Deluxe Birthday Deal
Having two friends stay with you all day to allow for the following:
*Sleeping In
*Coffee, banana bread & fruit in bed while you read magazines of your choice
*House decorated from floor to ceiling with streamers and balloons
*Delicious breakfast of rainbow colored pancakes (with candles), breakfast casserole, bacon and juice
*Time to open presents, containing a wonderful mix of items you asked for, silly items that make you smile and items you wanted, but forgot you wanted until you opened them
*Rest Time - read, visit, laugh
*Movie Time - your choice of course!  Friends will remain and laugh alongside you as you indulge in guilty pleasures, like watching Tyler Perry's "Madea" movies or 80's throwbacks like Labyrinth.  Munchies provided.
*Friend Time - visit a friend of your choice, where there will be more presents, more food (including the yummiest ever birthday cake), and more silly cards.  (The Delightful Scollards and their 7 lovely children were the perfect choice for my Birthday evening - complete with perfect strawberry short-cake!)
*Giggle Time - finish the evening off by watching YouTube videos and laughing until tears stream down your face...more than likely a reaction to your heart being so full of love and gratitude.

Not Quite Deluxe Birthday Deal
*All of the above, minus breakfast appetizer, a few presents, Movie Time and evening Friend Time

Even Lamer Birthday Deal
*One cup of coffee
*One present
*One movie

Why Even Bother Birthday Deal
*Subtract everything in the Deluxe Birthday Deal
*Add bowling

We can talk pricing if you are interested in any of the above deals.

As you can guess, I had the Deluxe Birthday Deal!
In addition to all the wonder and glory the day brought, I was blessed with phone calls and cards from those far and wide.  Oh, and a new dress from my Mom who said she would get us the baby's crib for my birthday but couldn't help herself and had to send a present as well.  I hope I'm as good a Mom as she is.
 
THANK YOU to everyone who made the day special, especially to Mr. T, Jordanne and the Scollards for being the Cream of the Crop in this world!  If only everyone had people like you in their circle of friends!