A Birth Story

A couple days ago we got the internet at our house.

That means at least two things:

1. We are no longer Amish.

2. I can now commence with the blogging.

Shall we begin...

As promised last time I blogged, I thought I'd go ahead and share how our Tidytot came into this world.

First of all, you should know that I was born about three weeks PAST my due date.  Not a kind thing to do to my mother, especially since she had to endure several more weeks of the August heat because of my procrastination.  Truth be told, I've been late ever since.  Never been on time for anything.  Probably never will be. 

Anyway, the point is that we were extra surprised when Tidytot came two weeks early!  This trait was not passed down from her mother.  I had just ended my employment and was gearing up to tackle a long "Things To Do Before Baby Comes" list.  The biggest thing to do was clean up our basement, which is our garage, laundry, storage and guest room all in one.  Some time ago our deep freeze went out (terrible story...I'll have to tell you later.)  In that process I pulled everything out of the storage side of our basement and into the guest room side.  It was trashed.  I mean TER-ASHED!  Stuff everywhere.  And it was really important to clean because my Mom was going to need a place to sleep when the baby arrived.

However, ready or not, here she came!

I started having contractions about 11:30 on Tuesday night.  Previously she had been kicking my ribs for weeks and I was waiting for her to "drop" so that the pressure in my ribs would be eased.  When the contractions started I hoped she had FINALLY dropped.  Then I thought, "If this is what it's like, I'd rather have her in my ribs!"  I felt the contractions for about an hour before I woke up Mr. T.  We started timing and discovered they were about 3 - 5 minutes apart.  Mr. T and I packed our bags.  I started to get weepy because we weren't ready and the basement wasn't ready and the dog wasn't ready and so on!  Next, a 2am call to the Dr. who correctly informed us that we needed to wait.  So, back to bed Mr. T went.  I headed down to the basement and started organizing the chaos in between my midnight contractions.  By the time morning rolled around the basement was ready to go.

We already had an ultrasound and appointment scheduled for Wednesday at noon.  Throughout Wednesday morning, I timed contractions, watched a movie and tried to eat as little as possible, just in case.  

Next, I drank my 8 gallons of water to prep for the ultrasound, we loaded our bags, and Mr. T and I headed to the hospital.  Contractions plus a full bladder do not mix well.  Fortunately, when we got to the room, the lab tech informed me that I didn't have to have a full bladder since I was so far along.  I loved that lab tech for saying I could use the bathroom.  I loved her so much I added her to my Christmas card list.

Ultrasound - check.

We ate lunch next.  Well, Mr. T ate lunch.  I just picked at a few things that I thought wouldn't look too gross if I threw them up.

Then the Dr.'s appointment.  I was still having contractions somewhat consistently and they were increasing in intensity.  Translation - they were starting to hurt, but I could deal with it.  However, Mr. T and I both thought they would roll their eyes and say, "Your contractions aren't bad enough yet.  You're not even in labor.  Come back in a couple of weeks."  

About 2:00 the Dr. came in to see how far I was dilated   May I take a moment and just say that there were many things I didn't know about labor and delivery.  For example, I didn't know that your cervix is actually located up by your esophagus.  I learned that when they checked to see how far I was dilated.  

Then the big shocker came.

"Oh my goodness!  You're already dilated to a 6, 100% effaced and (something about the head being in the right position)." said my Dr.  (For those who have no idea what that meant...you dilate to a 10 and then the baby comes.  I was over halfway.)

"Holy guacamole!" Mr T said.

"Well, shoot! This is going to be easier than I thought!" I said.

Famous last words.

Labor on, blah, blah, blah.

About 6:00 they broke my water.  They'd been offering pain medication and epidurals but I'd declined, thus far.  After they broke my water, I became nervous about how much worse the pain was going to get so I decided to try this pain medicine they put in your IV.  It was supposed to take the edge off, however, it only "took the edge off" for about 20 minutes.  I had two shots of it, but it wasn't really worth it.  The worst part is that now I can't brag about going through labor without pain medication because I had that dumb medicine that didn't even work!  

I can't remember what time the contractions started getting bad.  I do remember that it really, really, really hurt.  And then it started to hurt more.  And then all the medical people came and set up their tools and what not.  My breathing started to get kind of wonky and turned into more like hysterical crying/hyperventilating.  I tried to tell all of the medical professionals that I could not do it!  

"Yes you can," they would say.

"Actually I can't!" I would reply.

"You're almost there.  We can see the baby's head," came their sweet retorts.

"I SAID I CAN'T DO IT!!!!!!"

 Nobody was listening to me.

I guess they were right after all.  I pushed for 30 minutes and out she came at 7:17 pm.  All blue and slippery and screaming.

My first thought was, "Wow, she's so cool!"  Followed immediately by, "Why the HAY didn't I get the epidural!?"     

They say you get amnesia about the whole thing and slowly start to forget.  I've forgotten some things, but still remember quite a bit.  I think it's easier for men to forget.  I recently asked Mr. T when he'd like to start trying for another baby. 

He replied, "Well, according to my calculations, you'll be ovulating on Sunday."  

I guess that means he's ready. 

I'll post pictures tomorrow.  (Of Sage, not of the delivery.)